It's raining. I wonder if you'd take a walk with me in the rain and hold my hand? May I share my umbrella with you? Would we run in the rain or leisurely walk?
Sometimes I wonder if this reaches you. I believe it does. You'd come here, after all. You just wouldn't reply. However, you know it's me. And that's alright. I love you for it anyways. I love you for all your shyness, all your venom, all of you. When you're flustered, it's the sweetest thing. When you lash out at me, it rips me in two that your suffering. When you ask questions, I freeze because I'm terrified of saying the incorrect thing. Ah, you're worth every moment even all these years later. Almost nine. Nine. That's insane. I hope I don't cause you too much concern. Your happiness, your wellbeing is my priority after all. I love you. I wish I had said that to you before. So I'm saying it now with words. I hope all these years have spoken of my devotion on their own although I doubt it. I love you, my sweet darling Puppy. May your fingers glide across the keys like how you're the wind through my hair.
I don't know how to handle people who can't understand nor cope with the fact a pet died. It is dead. Must you delude yourself with the idea that it is still alive so you might live? Things happen. Insisting to me that your pet is alive is not well for my mental health so why must you shove your inability to cope onto me?
"Will he treat you like shit, just the way that I did?"
It's almost summer once again. Please stay hydrated. Please take care of yourself. Once again I'm listening to sad songs that remind me of you. Maybe, maybe one day I'll be as lovely as you. Maybe I'll make music that can reach your soul like how you reached mine. If not, will words suffice? Would that be enough? Am I enough? I hope one day I will be.
